New Year's Resolution 2009

Well it's about that time of year again, and I can't help but feel a bit nostalgic. I know people say making resolutions is pointless and that they are made to be broken, but I don't believe it. Any time that brings a fresh start is a good time to make it a turning point in your life. So in light of this fact, I am making my resolutions for 2009:

1. Only use my credit cards when it's an absolute emergency, or if I know for sure I can pay it off before the bill comes.


2. No repeat arguments with D- if it's worth it to bring up, it's worth it to talk (or battle) it out until it's totally squashed.


3. No more pork- I tell myself that bacon is not pork...this needs to stop.


4. Donate to at least 3 charitable causes.


5. Maintain at least a 3.5 GPA.


6. Pay off whatever is lurking...(creepy)


7. Jog regularly (a few times a week)


8. Start an aerobics or yoga class


9. Find a couple for me and D to be friends with


10. Start a book club


11. Take a vacation

So I don't think these are too hard to grasp or achieve, and frankly their already things I have started to do. Tomorrow I'll be eating a lot of bacon...right up to 11:59...

10 Things That "Urk" Me...

1. Americans who use the phrase "cheers". This doesn't make you sound more worldly...it's just annoying.
2. Fat people who take up two seats on the subway.
3. Overpriced Manhattan food...even McDonald's is more expensive here. Ugh....
4. Kids with no home-training.
5. People who think it's ok to feed their kids ANYTHING.
6. Celebrities who complain about being popular.
7. People who just stand in silence instead of saying, "Excuse me..." (New Yorkers don't do this...)
8. Tourists who ask where a good place to eat in the city is...(wtf?? There are a zillion restaurants, who am I Zagats?)
9. Women who buy fake designer bags...Your not fooling anyone but yourself.
10. Women who don't take the time to do their hair or make-up, but spend $40 on fiberglass nail art.

Why Does This Never Happen to Me???

Sara Jessica Parker volunteered at Barack Obama's NYC headquarters today calling undecided voters.... I would literally UN-VOTE just so SJP could call me.

We would, of course, become best friends.

Sick Sad World (a skeptical review of the times)

Anyone remember that old MTV show, Daria...you know...right before they started flooding every one's lives with "reality" TV? My generation was almost at it's point of no return with MTV, save for the obsession with the one ray of hope, the single item on their roster that came even close to baring truth to the teen experience (at least the teen experience of my day). Daria simply rocked.

Remember on Daria the show that always came on she and her friends would watch with a glazed look over their faces, 'Sick, Sad World'? The show that mocked all shows, and seemed to be the biggest over-statement of the entertainment world, at least at the time (late 90's). Well, take a look around...we're living in it. The obscene following of mediocre, food-deprived pop stars, the matter-of-fact attitude towards hard core drug use (why do people still book Amy Winehouse??), the disgusting insult to every one's intelligence that is called "commercial advertisement"...is it just me or has the REAL world (the actual world, not the "reality" show) become it's own caricature???

Maybe this is "growing up", the diapers coming off so to speak. The second coming of mental development, when my sensory perception once again changes and I look around to find that I wasn't REALLY seeing anything before. Because of this, I can laugh it all off. I can laugh off the fact that HONESTLY come November we get to choose between a half-dead vet. and a moose-killing insane person or a president who, lets all face it...has a higher chance of being assassinated then all the Kennedys combined (God forbid). I can laugh off the fact that the only television I can stand these days are old re-runs of the Mary Tyler Moore Show- live streamed, sexless and commercial free. I can also laugh off the fact that whether it be the second coming of Christ, a massive hydrogen bomb or good ole' green house gases; we are all probably going to see the end of the world much sooner than we should.

Happy Hump Day!!

Envy of the Mindless

Today a homeless man rode between cars through the tunnel to the next stop. I wondered what it would feel like to be that free. Free of shame, free of material need, although I'm assuming something griped him. His eyes were that kind of empty they can get when your vices get the best of you. Of course I would never want to ride between cars through the dark tunnels of the subway. To smell the dank wetness of New York's literal underground, and know that thousands of rats are hoping your ass falls off so they have something to munch on until the cops find you. But just to be that free, void of second thought. Openly insane, instead of keeping your strange thoughts to yourself like the rest of the humans. It's not like I haven't ever walked past a statuesque fountain and thought for a brief moment what it would be like to kick off my shoes and go traipsing through the shallow penny-ridden water. Right there in front of all the lunching business people, who would surely drop their turkey on rye in shock. There I would be splashing up water and singing "The Hills Are Alive". These are things we simple think, but do not do. And in that way, I'm jealous of those with fractured minds, who don't even have enough sense to know their crazy.

Oh How I Miss Summer

My Mom is Going to Hate This...

Contrary to my mother's belief, I don't just think Brad Pitt is a womanizing, degenerate. In a single shot Brad Pitt managed to be; economical, democratic, literate and insanely attractive in this photo taken of him in New Orleans today (yes, that is an Obama sticker on his notebook):

Grow Up, Grown Ups...

I know that compared to most people, I’m considerably young. I’m not even technically in my mid-twenties yet. Unmarried, no kids; pretty much carefree. I'm still at that point were acting recklessly, is not only acceptable but expected of me, whether or not I choose to. Which I don’t. My taste in a lot of things, reflects my age and personality. I’m never going to sport neon pink tights and a mini skirt to work, and I don’t listen to Chris Brown. But I still get drunk at parties (hence the nick name “Smashley”), and I have been known to stay out until just a few hours before it’s time to go to work. I’m 24 years young; but far from a teenager. (Thank God).

Not everyone, understands how old they are. Like today for example. I’m on the train to work, and about to crack open a Jhumpa Lahiri novel when the silence was invaded by Keyshia Cole. I turned to see who the offender was, and there stood a 45-year old man, dressed in an over sized Rocawear t-shirt (mind you it’s 55 degrees outside) and baggy pants. He was bobbing his head aggressively to “Let it Go”. He might as well have had his iPod hooked up to speakers as loud as his headphones were blaring. I cringed at the thought of what he might be doing to his, probably already failing hearing ability. He looked old enough to be my father, and he was making a complete idiot out of himself. Turn the shit down, and at least dress like you have a job.

I see this all the time. D and I have a running joke about grown people who have a SideKick. A device designed to make parents spend $400 on a phone for their high schoolers. It’s not practical for anyone over the age of 20 MAYBE 21. If you want an over sized, overpriced, overrated cell phone, get a Blackberry. Or an iPhone. But it’s not just cell phones that I see grown adults holding onto, it’s the whole mentality. Bashing enemies on Myspace, using their headlines as picket signs. Stuffing their two-kid having asses into shrunken, stone washed pairs of skinny-jeans. This might be innocent behavior if it didn’t effect the kids these people have so much. I can count on both hands the number of times I’ve seen a young (but not so young) mother on the train toting around her four kids well past 3 or 4 am.

I know it’s hard to tell where the line is drawn between completely carefree youth to young adulthood. I know we would all like to go back to a time when all we had to do was wake up, pay attention and do home work. But just let that go an embrace whats before you. Real life. The unbridled, uncensored life that is adulthood. Give it a try, otherwise your going to end up looking life this at 50:

A Little Obsessed w/Polyvore This Week

Try it..

When Time Falls Back

I've always been ambiguous to the "in-between" seasons. The one's missing that extreme weather element that keeps me thriving and alive. No scorching heat, no blistering snow (or as a former California girl, I should say, "no heavy, relentless rain."), nothing to hate, nothing to run from. Fall and Spring are irritatingly uneventful seasons; yet ones I can't complain about.

On Saturday, Tia and I said goodbye to Summer by sitting in McCarren Park and peddled off our closet discards. Shoes, bags, books, etc. We started out selling our stuff at fair market value but by the time we were closing up (and after receiving a summons for drinking beer in public) we started unloading everything we had for a quarter each. What we had left over will be going promptly to exchange as soon as I find the ovaries to haul that huge suitcase full of crap down to North 11th (again).

The thing I can say about Fall, is that it brings the most interesting fashion possibilities. Your not required to walk around stark naked, baring every inch of skin within legal limits. No horrible binge/purge diet to maintain so that your love handles are less obvious in the tub top you insisted on buying despite not finding the size you actually wear (hypothetically, of course). No sticky, sour sweat beads running down your face taking with it what bit of make up you were able to apply before the humidity of your bedroom forced you to leave or pass out on the floor. And conversely, no horrid winter garb that makes you look like a wool-spun mummy waddling down the street with nothing but your eyes poking through a mess of scarf/earmuff/hat. No, Fall blesses us all with a bite of cold just cool enough for fedoras, wool skirts and calf-high leather boots; yet sun-kissed for our silk blouse, light blazer wearing delight. And I plan on taking full advantage.

Fall flatters my figure the best, and my diet. No sugar-glutted popsicles to get me through the night, and not much of a need for over-priced, grande-soy-no whip-extra hot-caramel-latte to get me through the morning. Just good old fashioned low calorie soup.

So while Fall doesn't ignite any extra passion nor foot-tapping blithe; it still leaves me all tingly inside. Why? Basically for the same reasons it annoys me; because theirs nothing to hate, nothing to run from. Just pure, breezy, fence-balancing, good ole fashioned, un-obvious weather. Yay.

A Big HUG

I've been hoping to gain hits on my page lately, simply because I like to feel special, and a friend of mine recommended this site: http://www.rsshugger.com/

For those of you who are bloggers of all walks of nature and would like to know where you can submit your blog for review and directory this is the perfect place. The website is well made and easy to access, everything is very clear and simple and there's a great span of community with a Top 100 list updated monthly and discussion forums. It really does feel like a little cyber hug.