Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Sleeping and I Can't Get Up


I feel so out of touch. So a-mess...so broken and tired and out of it. It goes way before Grams...I've felt like this a little more each day for a while. I feel like I need to overhaul my life. Make a dramatic change.


I feel like going through everything I own and throwing out anything that doesn't make me immediately smile.


I feel like emptying my address book of any contacts I haven't heard from in more than 6 months.


I want to stop eating cheese (but I probably won't)


I want to loose a bunch of weight...like to the point where people start wondering if I'm ok.


I want to revamp my iPod and find new music.


I want to start packing, even though I'm not sure yet where I'm going.


I just want to move or dance or something.


Ughhh..I just want to jump off a cliff or ride a roller coaster or a bull or something dangerous.


I want to get the hell away from all these fat fucks in Houston and go back to my own habitat...I want to scream and bitch slap the entire world, and tell it to wake up. And tell it to wake me up.


(©2009 Lotus B.)

3 comments:

nothingprofound said...

Hope this malaise ends soon. Thought you were moving back to NY to get a fresh start? Keeping a low profile? Haven't seen much of you on the forum lately.

Selah said...

I need you to get out of my head! Sheesh! I could've written this! (even though mine wouldn't have been so eloquent and cool lol) Just exchange fat fucks in houston for Long Beach and there you have it.


I say gon' head and do all of it. Except the jump off a cliff part. The worst that could happen is you'd have to unpack your clothes before you run out of clean underwear. LOL

Not moving to NY?

Lotus B. said...

@NP

I know I haven't been on BC in a while... I haven't seen anyone on BC either..last time I checked in no one was really posting... No one that matters (hee hee). R u on there these days?